Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Decathlon Event #8

Event #8: Creative, Embellishment

OK, this third and final creative event is inspired by the New Yorker's Cartoon Caption Contest, which has been running on the last page of that excellent magazine for the past few years.

Below are three images. Your task is to render them highly amusing by adding text. There are a number of different ways you could do this, including:

  • a standard explanatory caption, of the kind you might see under a newspaper photograph.
  • a dialog caption, as in a classic New Yorker-style cartoon.
  • speech or thought balloons to indicate dialog, as in most comic books.
  • labels that turn the image into some kind of allegory, as in a political cartoon.

Mixing and matching is fine; e.g., you could give a newspaper caption to one image, give one speech balloons, and turn the other one into a political cartoon.

Now, you could get all fancy with your image-processing software if you wanted too, but lord knows I've asked you guys to jump through enough hoops already these last few weeks. So, if you want to use labels, thought balloons, or whatever, you can just describe them in words.

Submit your entry in the comments or email it to M5KDecathlon@gmail.com.

Judging: Making the judge laugh will get you a long way. Profundity, innuendo, unexpected insights, classical and/or literary references, and dazzling wordplay are all good too, but only if they don't get in the way of the funniness.

Deadline: Your captions should be in by 10 p.m. Friday, May 16.

Image #1

Image #2

Image #3


Elizabeth said...

Image #1

After the chicken and swan barbecue, the ladies dancing hitched up the remaining geese and calling birds to the wagon and drove through the town hurling pears at the passers-by.

Image #2

"Wait a minute - it will go away."

Image #3

Consequences of voting Republican again.

Anonymous said...

Image #1

Above is the the newly released pictorial display of the Bush Administration's food pyramid for the 21st century.

Image #2

The mother church announces a new strategy in the battle against pedophile priests.

Image #3

God I hate you you f@cking b!tch.

Anonymous said...

I can't believe that the M5K Decathlon actually has its own email address.

McGuff said...

“Girl 2: The key to a good rolling orgy is to be pulled very slowly.
Goose: And if no men hop onto the wagon we play ‘duck, duck, goose’ vestal virgin-style.”

Bonus Entry (from my boss): “Early pizza delivery didn’t work as expected”.

“Oh no, no, no. I’m not buying the Immaculate Conception story this time.”

“This is just the beginning of a lifetime of abuse and manipulation by the women in your life. Get used to it.”

Bonus entry (not for competition purposes):
“Charlie, you f**ked up. You trusted me.”
Paraphrased from the classic 1978 film Animal House.

Rebel said...

dude - I can't compete! Phineas made me spit tea out with that first caption!

Anonymous said...

"You think this lot is annoying? Next week's tour group is The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse."

Jan's fur sunbonnet sets the tone for indoor living, while the verdant folds of Bettina's dress echo the hills of her youth.

Brown's Season Opener Still Up in Air

fingerstothebone said...


Art historians confirmed the recent discovery of a medieval manuscript that describes the tradition that apparently goes back hundreds of years -- the ducks parading their cheerleaders to rile up the crowds into a pre-game frenzy. Shown is a leaf from the manuscript.


"Beam us up, Scotty...beambeambeam...Maartje, Toto, me, Jan's slippers...Jan's slippers! Scotty, where's Jan?!"


Voodoo football. Lucy demonstrates how to use it.

Cartophiliac said...

1. "OK, so if they float they are witches... wait! What does that make us?"

2. "Husband, they way you sleep around, I cannot even be certain the child is mine!"

3. "But you told me that the football was Weapon of Mass Destruction!"

Anonymous said...

OK, two more college football headlines, these for the first two images:

Ducks Walk Away with Orange Bowl

William and Mary Off to Good Start

DrSchnell said...

1. (first duck turning around dialogue:) "Sure beats migrating!"
2. (dialogue balloon from the dude): "I told you this would happen if you kept cavorting with those duck wagon harlots."
3. caption below photo:

Rebel said...

Ok... I'm going to give it a go for the participation points if nothing else.

1. How do you like them apples? Quack quack.
2. "Dost this gown maketh me look fat?" "Talketh to the hand, woman"
3. It's the negative energy that you're putting out into the universe, Charles. If you really believe in the power of the universe to provide you with a football, the football will be there.

Dan Nolan said...

1. "It doesn't mean they're going to sleep with us, idiot. They're just using us because we got our licenses"

2. "I'm just saying: I'm not walking it, I'm not feeding it, and I will lock it in the East Tower if it starts barking. This is YOUR dog."

3. "At least Sisyphus didn't have a choice..."

Anonymous said...

Image 1 --

Dialogue balloon over talking bird: "Whichever direction we take them, these Vestal Vegans turn to face the sketch artist".

Image 2 --

Dialogue balloon over male: "I don't care if you're pregnant. That's a bed right behind you, and that horn growing out of the left side of our head is making me as horny as hell".

Image 3 --

Caption under image: "Lucy's strategy helps Charlie come within three inches of his goal of devouring his left foot."

Michael5000 said...

And now, michael5000's captions -- I came up with these on Wednesday:

One: "I still can't believe you talked the horses into volunteering for 'table duty.'"

Two: "Honest, honey -- it really doesn't make you look fat!"

Three: Lucy is labelled "Technological Progress."

The football is labelled "Universal Prosperity."

Charlie Brown is labelled "Mankind."