Tuesday, May 12, 2009

The Great Movies: "Sweet Smell of Success"


Sweet Smell of Success
Alexander Mackendrick, 1957

It is hard for a modern viewer to suspend disbelief in Sweet Smell of Success, which is set in a world where all power is concentrated in the hands of that most powerful and feared of all great men: the newspaper gossip columnist. Well, everyone knows that the print journalist has been laid low by the mighty blogger. Yet even in our glorious age of allegedly decentralized access to information, there persist people with a great deal of power and other people who eke out a living by brokering access to them. So although its specific referants are obsolete, Sweet Smell of Success can still be read as a general study of the ancient and eternal craft of toadying.

Unlike Ebert, though, I don't find the relationship between the two main characters -- the columnist and the publicity agent desperate to remain in his favor -- particularly interesting. What I liked about this movie instead was its immersion in the popular culture of the early 1950s. The setting is the night clubs of New York at the last moment in American history when the cool, trendy kids weren't actually kids; they were adults. They put on formal clothes to go out to expensive clubs and listen to sophisticated jazz combos. Within a few years, the beatniks would wrest the torch of hipness from their elders and hide it away in the dress-down dives where various strands of rock music and other forms of radical behavior would incubate and from which the youth-obsessed popular culture we know and love today would eventually emerge. But Sweet Smell of Success revels in its dying moment of postwar jazz sophistication, its cameras prowling the clubs as if they, like the lead characters, were on a first-name basis with every waiter and doorman.

The supporting characters in Sweet Smell of Success are often more interesting than the somewhat one-dimensional leads. Pay attention to the movie's best scene, in which a rival columnist discovers to his own great surprise that he'd rather admit an infidelity to his wife than be blackmailed into ruining a stranger's career. That three minutes of screen time is worth the price of your ticket.

Plot: A powerful newspaper guy doesn't want his sister, with whom he has a decidedly creepy relationship, to get married. He commands a press agent who depends on his patronage to break up the relationship. The movie is not, as you might expect, about the moral choice that the press agent must make -- he feels vaguely bad about splitting up the happy young couple, but barely hesitates in fulfilling his commission. It's more about the practical problems he encounters in contriving to make people miserable. Put another way, you could say the movie is about the limits of power when applied against people who are fundamentally decent.

Visuals: Slick! Mackendrick's New York City is stark neon light against deep black night. Filmed on location, it looks as picture-perfect as any set ever could.

Dialog: Straight out of the noir tradition, heavy on the wisecracks and the hard-bitten cynicism. Plenty of casual cruelty to the womenfolk, which to the film's credit is clearly portrayed as such. Underlain by a fabulous steamy jazz soundtrack composed by Elmer Bernstein.

Prognosis: Hardly a must-see, but a good pick for fans of jazz, the 1950s, the history of the New York club scene, or, you know, the dynamics of power as enacted at the level of lived experience. If we have any sociologists in the house.

Monday, May 11, 2009

The Monday Quiz! What?!? Why are you throwing things at me?!?

So, it's Monday, and you know what that means -- it's time for the Monday Quiz! Everybody ready for a quiz?

No?

Well, me either. I'm quizzed out after 10 straight days of rigorous quiz action. Meanwhile, with literally hundreds of unread posts on my Reader, I am teetering on the brink of blog bankruptcy. So let's take the week off, quizwise, and instead of getting a quiz ready I'll go see what YOU have to say, for a change.

But all told, I thought it was a pretty good decathlon, didn't you? I mean, over the course of the two weeks, the American stock market was up more than six percent and that whole Swine Flu business seemed to pretty much blow over. And, I read that the economy is tanking more gradually now! I'm not claiming credit or anything. But it IS a pretty interesting correlation!

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Decathlon: The Winners!


And with no further ado whatsoever, it's time for the victory parade!

In 11th Place -- but only 1 thin point behind 9th place -- la gringissima, with 160 points! Perfect performances in Events 9 and 10 helped overcome two missed contests and keep last year's Blue Medal winner in the race.

In 9th Place -- a tie! gl. and Elaine, strong contestants throughout, each amassed 161 points. A special sportsperson award for gl., who after a very strong run through the whole Decathlon reacted to a (for her) disasterous topic for the final event with considerable grace and charm.

In 8th Place -- Elizabeth scored 175 points to place 8th, two places up from her 2008 finish.

In 7th Place -- The Calico Cat complements her trove of Thursday Quiz Gold Stars with a strong Decathlon finish, with 176.5 total points scored.

In 6th Place -- It's a good year for the Alaskans, as in addition to balaywho's 6-event showing Kadonkadonk takes overall sixth place with 183.5 total points.

The Red Medal

5th Place Overall goes to a relative newcomer to L&TM5K competition. Representing Eugene, Oregon, with perfect finishes in Events 1 & 6 and an overall score of 201.5, annie takes the 2009 Red Medal!

The Green Medal

Due to a tie for third, there is no Green Medal this year.

The Blue Medals

Out of 250 possible points, how likely is it that there would be a tie for third at 203.5 points? Not very likely, that's how likely.

One Blue Medal goes to the defending 2008 gold medalist. Representing Portland, Oregon, with perfect finishes in events 8 and 9, it's Mrs.5000!

The other Blue Medal goes to the winner of the Visual Creativity competition. Representing the great state of Colorado, it's d!

The Silver Medal

Second place in the 2009 Decathlon goes to a woman who once briefly visited a young Thursday Quiz, dominated it utterly for a few weeks, and then seemingly disappeared... before returning to put in another dominating performance here. Currently representing, if I am not mistaken, Chicago, Illinois, with a perfect finish in Event 9, second place in the Verbal Creativity event, and 205.5 total points, Missy takes the 2009 Silver Medal!

The Gold Medal

The overall winner added a crushing second-week performance to an already strong opening to capture, defend, and ultimately extend a big lead across the finish line. Currently representing the Lone Star State, with first place in the Verbal Creativity event and a massive 218.5 Decathlon points, Eversaved takes the 2009 Gold Medal.


Gentle Readers!

I present to you the slate of Decathlon winners -- the people who have, through their creativity, knowledge, wit, buffness, and sheer stamina shown themselves to be the greatest all-around human beings on the planet! Or -- lets be fair -- at least in the English speaking world.


Prizes

One of the top four medals has been taken by Mrs.5000, who will be rewarded with a batch of the oatmeal-almond-chocolate chip cookies. This means that the four Relatively Sweet Prizes will be awarded to Eversaved, Missy, d, and annie, who will get to select from them in that order. Look for an email coming soon to your inbox, winners.

Decathlon: The Special Awards


Before we get to the winners and the distribution of booty, let's start with a salute to some of the folks who made this all possible:

The Guest Judges: Professors Piper and Webb, MyDogIsChelsea, and Mrs. ChuckDaddy made this a lot more fun and fair by helping me with the difficult job of ranking the creative entries of brilliantly creative people. They were good-humored and prompt and very receptive to what must have seemed like a very strange request indeed. They rock.

The Spouse: In her role as wife, Mrs.5000 has been very tolerant of the amount of time and brooding self-indulgence it takes to put on a Decathlon. My thanks to her for that.

The Caffeine: As always, my great thanks and a good chunk of my disposable income go out to the good people at Sound Grounds at 38th and Belmont for their unfailing supply of snacks and yummy beverages. I don't know how I'd do it without them!

The Competitors!
Many enter, but not all can finish. This is the Decathlon, by its very nature a grueling contest of endurance. There were a lot of entrants who ended up dropping out or scratching on a few events due to brain cramp, the ennui, or troublesome real-world intrusions such as travel, sickness, or professional crisis. We salute everyone who gave it a shot!

The Triathletes!

David Dean, DrSchnell, Morgan, and Snowgirl all finished three events apiece. David Dean led the triathletes with 64 total points.

The Quadrathletes!

MJ and Nichim both completed four events; of the two, MJ came out on top with 83 total points.

The Pentathlete!

PB competed in half of the events, amassing a solid 85.5 total points along the way.

The Sexathletes!

No, wait. We should probably call them....

The Hexathletes!

A distinguished group of frequent L&TM5K commentors all completed six events, including balaywho, Ben, Cartophiliac, Vice Dork Emeritus fingerstothebone, and current Blog Dork Rex Parker! Her first-place finish in the Physical Prowess contest and strong overall performance put balaywho just on top of this group, with 116.5 total points.

The Octathletes!

La gringissima put together a very strong run at the title, managing to gather 160 points in just eight events.

The Nonathletes!

Again, not the best name, but it's the only thing I can think of for "people who competed in nine of the events." All of them -- gl., Kadonkadonk, Rebel, Sandy, and Serendipity -- were right there in the thick of the competition. Kadonk scored highest of the group, with a monster 183.5!

The Lurkers!

We'll never know about you guys. But I hope you had fun with this too!

Event #7: The Results


The Verbal Creativity Entries were diverse and of an impressive level of quality. Guest Jurist Amy Sage Webb and I wrestled with putting them into any kind of order, but at the end of the day were in broad agreement about which were the cream, and which were the creme de la creme.

Many thanks to Ms. Webb, who gave up end-of-the-semester grading time to take on a task that I think was both harder but more fun than she expected. She is, incidentally, a writer and Professor of English and Creative Writing at Emporia (Kansas) State University. An inspired teacher, she also holds a lifetime spot on the shortlist of Smartest People Michael5000 Has Ever Met.

Honorable Mentions!

Because of obvious space restraints, we won't be able to put any of the entries up here in their entirety. I'll try to put at least the top winners up on the L&TM5K Facebook page, so you can read them there at your leisure.

But here, lamentably, there is only space for a few of the excellent entries sent in. Indeed, we can only briefly touch on such gems as gl.'s "The Vegetarian Abecedarium":

A is for apples, delicious and fair
B is for broccoli, quite simple to prepare
C is for cantaloupe, so round and so sweet
D is for daikon, a sharp-tonguéd treat....

Or d's dialogue between a troubled young tomato and an older, more sophisticated pear:

'Well, if you look at it from my point of view,' D'anjou replied, 'You fit into two worlds, whereas I only fit into one. So your possibilities are almost limitless. You can go out about town with Leafy Greens or Mozzarella or sweet, tart Cranberry and no one would look askance. You can even just be all boring and hang with other tomatoes if you want. 'Cause no one knows what you are.'

'Yes. You are correct. But don't you see how limitless possibilities are really, if you think about it, somewhat terrifying?'

'Oh boo hoo. I would love to be in your shoes. Because frankly, other pears strike me as rather dull....'

Sandy's "An Almost Complete Alphabet of Musical Aging: When I Was Young; and Now We Are 45 and Watch FOX" was well-received by both judges, who are of a certain age:

A is for Another Brick in the Wall
A is for Aging Rockers Mentor Contestants

B is for Bollocks
B is for Bedtime Gets In The Way of Watching The Results Show

C is for Culture Club
C is for Country Music Week...

And Elizabeth's Shakespearean scene, chockablock with fruit and veggie references both plausible and outlandish:

Foccaccio: Ho there! What house art thou, what lord's device
Shows on thy cloak? Art du Berry's pledged man,
Or does the orange of William shine upon
Thy mantle?

Third Place!

Mrs.5000 proved the world is actually getting better, not worse, with a news article chronicaling the improvement of chain letters over time. Her exhaustive research begins with a typical chain letter of today:

You’ve received this e-mail because someone knows you care. DON’T LET THE PLANET DOWN! Drop what you’re doing right now—this will only take a minute of your time.

First, start a new e-mail message. Follow these easy steps and the world will be a better place—starting immediately!

In the first message line, put five adjectives (words like “creative” or “freckled” or “sassy”) that describe you.

In the second line, write three verbs (action words ending in “-ing”) of things you like to do. Use your imagination!

In the third line, finish the sentence, “I can see…” by describing something you can see from where you are right now, such as “a blue glass filled with pencils,” or “pine trees waving in the wind.”

Now, in the fourth line, write down something that you would really like to change about the world! Do you want to end war, or clean the oceans? Here’s your chance! Just complete the sentence, “I want to…”

Now put “I WANT TO SAVE THE WORLD” in the subject heading of the e-mail and send it to your congressperson. You can find the e-mail address of your congressperson here.

Congratulations, you’ve just helped to save the world. Just think how much we can accomplish if we all work together and voice our concerns.

There’s just one last step, but it’s very important. Forward this message to twenty people you know who care. Don’t hesitate. Don’t delay. Show you care and spread the word!

From here, we are treated to several historical examples, culminating with the "oldest example of a chain letter found to date," translated from 5000 year old hieroglyphics:

scratch rock
rock throw bad (enemy) man
many many many rock
rock throw bad (wounded) man
bad (wounded enemy) man not-existing
blessed earth-goddess
all sing blessed earth-goddess
all throw rock
The piece, says Professor Webb, "demonstrates tremendous range with a form we have all experienced but that I’ve seen little done with. Real evidence of literary history here.... Very creative." I thought so too.

Second Place!

Missy crafted a tone-perfect introduction to a noir detective story, establishing the hallmark dark tone and introducing plot complications and reversals already in around twenty short paragraphs. The twist? All the characters -- the detective, the villain, the victims, even the dame -- are fruits and vegetables. The villain, for instance, is a potato:

This one had eye spots and sprouting roots all over, like he'd sat too long at the bottom of the bag and was looking for a way out, looking like he'd do whatever it took to get there. I don't usually take this kind of business, not because it didn't pay or because it was dangerous, but because vegetables like him didn't come to vegetables like me for help. They liked to take care of things... personally.

"What can I do for you?" I leaned back in my chair, trying to look cool like a cucumber ought to, and lit a cigarette.
"I admire the depth into which this parody plunges," says Amy, and we both wished that we could read the rest of what promised to be a very strange story indeed.

The Winner!

From detective noir with edible characters, we move to early 90s Mexican telenovela featuring relentless, relentless fruit-and-vegetable innuendo. Here's a sample:

Maria: Come to me!
(As Fernando approaches Maria, she grabs his collar and pulls him to her.)

Fernando: You’ve been weeping.

Maria: And why shouldn’t I have been? You smell of tamarind.

Fernando: And does this salty-sweet smell displease my love, my life, my sky?

Maria: Whose tamarind have you been in?

Fernando: Only yours!

Maria: Lies! I know you have been to see that Beatriz.

Fernando: Don’t be unreasonable. Of course I went to see Beatriz, but only because of you. You know her coconuts are the best in the region. Everyone sings praises of the roundness and size, and of the sweetness of their milk.

Maria: (pulls away and covers mouth in a gasp) How could you say that? I have my own coconuts! How could you go to Beatriz for hers instead!?
It is a special challenge to parody something that is already in essence a parody of itself, but Eversaved takes on telenovelas with wit, panache, high sillyness, and a downright unhealthy level of familiarity with the form. And vegetables!


And with that...

Let the victory celebrations begin!

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Don't Forget to Stretch Out Your Brain

All Decathlon Events have now officially ended. Entries for Event #7 have been forwarded to the external jurist. It will probably be at least late Saturday before everything has been scored and checked, and then the awards ceremonies and celebrations can begin. And then the recriminations!

Until then, my sincere congratulations and thanks to all participants for a race run with grace and good humor. I hope you have had at least half the fun I have, and less of the sleep deprivation.

M5K

Friday, May 8, 2009

Decathlon Event #10: The Finish Line


Deadline for Event #7: Friday 5/8, 6 pm PDT.
Deadline for Event #9: Friday 5/6, Noon PDT.
Deadline for Event #10: Saturday 5/9, Noon PDT.


The Final Event

This final Decathlon event is Monday Quiz style, with nine (9) images. Answers may be submitted until Noon Pacific Daylight Time Saturday.

Scoring: The first seven correct answers will be worth 3 Decathlon Points apiece. The eighth and ninth correct answers will be worth 2 Decathlon Points apiece.


What a long, strange variety of topics we've covered over the course of the week! But has there been a single map? A single flag? No, there has not. So on the final Friday, every contestant limp with exhaustion, the Decathlon returns home with a festival of:

Small Country Identification!

You've got the map! You've got the flag! What is the country?

1.




2.





3.




4.




5.




6.








7.





8.






9.



Submit your answers either in the comments or at M5KDecathlon@gmail.com.